Lately it has occurred to me just HOW deeply it can affect us when we are comparing ourselves to others, being compared to others by our loved ones, and simply having many outside sources such as magazines, TV, and especially SOCIAL MEDIA, that puts all kinds of images of “happiness” in our faces, eventually planting the seed of self-doubt.
Am I doing enough? Is there something wrong with me since I don’t look like him or her? What does he or she have that I do not have? Why does my life look differently than his, hers, theirs? What am I missing?
Perhaps one or ALL of those questions sound familiar. Perhaps you have been attacked by them at some point as well.
I love this quote:
“Comparison is the thief of joy - Don’t get robbed!”
There is a problem that I see in the world, and it’s one that got me all messed up for a long time. I fell victim to wanting to be absolutely sure that if and when I was compared to someone else, that I would win. This was because I was conditioned to believe a certain recipe for success, and one that actually ended up taking me AWAY from success rather than closer to it.
When we are trying to “Win” or be the best, or acquire the validation and accolades from our families and society, we miss the boat on the voice deep within that is calling to us. When we get quiet and LISTEN to this voice, it very often has an entirely different plan for us that the one we are forcing. This deep inner voice is loving and kind and supportive and UBER creative! However, it can be subtle and hard to hear at first, because our self-doubt, comparison, negative self-talk voice is SO darn loud after all the years we have fed it and allowed it to grow stronger and more powerful!
TIME TO STOP FEEDING THE MONSTER!
I am now recovering from this way of being in the world. For me, comparison and listening to sources outside myself about what was good, bad, successful, not successful, really screwed up my thinking! I became incapable of making authentic choices and following the voice within because I had so many other voices that I’d absorbed from outside sources, creating a whole LOT of self-doubt, shame, and insecurity, and I just kept trying to pour myself into the recipe of other people’s success! That said, I have to take responsibility. I cannot blame anyone or anything. I GAVE MY POWER AWAY to people, places, and things.
When we come to know better, it’s time to show up differently.
Once I identified with this, I was able to make different choices. It is a process, but one I am passionate about sharing because so many of us want to make the transition from what “They Say” to what “WE Say,” and simply do not know how. It can feel really hard, especially when you walk out your front door, or walk in the front door to your family’s house, and these beliefs and perceptions are re-enforced. It can be tempting to relapse on self-doubt and FEAR, but stay strong my friend. We are in a VERY special time, and things are shifting.
It is a time to recognise the Divine Light within YOU, to stand up for what YOU bring to the world, and to do whatever you can, big or small, to nurture that place inside of you that knows what you KNOW, and to feed that until it is the strongest voice in your head. It doesn’t matter what “They” think. When you get around people who see things differently, this is not a time to compare and wonder if they might be right. There is no such thing as right or wrong. There is what is right for YOU. What someone else says is right may not work for you, and it may not even work for them. Just because someone else is strong in their beliefs, their stories, their perceptions, means NOTHING, and especially nothing about you. Stay focused on YOUR purpose, YOUR passion, YOUR vision, YOUR dream, YOUR strengths, and go where the LOVE is.
Surround yourself with people who GET you, who appreciate you, and who you can be yourself with. Minimize your time with people who will never get you and don’t even want to try. They will only drain your energy. Pray for their health, happiness, and freedom, and move on!
So just for today, can you STOP comparing yourself to others? Can you STOP wasting your precious energy on what everyone else is doing, and use that incredible fuel for YOUR own life? If you lack clarity around what you are wanting or how to move in a more authentic direction in your life and create stability, can you journal about this, pray about this, ask the Universe for help about this? What are you willing to do today, big or small, that feeds YOUR soul, makes YOUR light shine brighter, and gives YOU the nourishment you need?
When you hear those creepy, mean, energy vampire voices trying to high-jack your day, feel free to use my favorite personal mantra, that I use throughout the day: “I love you, you are worthy. No matter what, I will not abandon you. I AM HERE. I love you. I bless you. I believe in you. Let their BE light. Shine bright.”
Here’s to YOUR journey, that will be unlike anyone else’s! Embrace it, Enjoy it, and be Enlightened by it!
Love to you,
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