Well my diver is picking me up in less than 3 hours to take me to the airport. Today I am leaving Ubud, leaving Bali, and heading to America. I have so many different emotions running through me about this. I am excited to see my family, to reconnect with old friends, and to explore the opportunities that await me there.
I suppose this represents the ending of one chapter and the beginning of another chapter. These are the times in our life that kick up the most fear, because there is so much unknown.
Australia was so amazing in so many ways and I have such a DEEP appreciation and gratitude for my time and relationships there. I haven’t said goodbye to them for good, just for now
I have come to experience this liberation from permanence.
When we go through life, acting as though each thing we do or decision we make is going to be “permanent,” it edits our freedom to do what we are guided to do in the moment.
Well, at least that’s what happens to me.
Therefore I find it really helpful to see everything as impermanent.
So far there is only one thing I can think of that I believe is permanent, and that is LOVE. I feel that LOVE never dies, it never ends, and it goes on forever and ever.
Even if someone dies, we die, our relationship ends, etc, the love , if it was REALLY love, that was there, will always be there, even if it gets covered up with layers of resentment, change, pain, and loss. So love is permanent, but everything else, well everything else always changes doesn’t it?
This helps me when I make decisions. I go with whatever my heart seems to be saying at the time, and usually my mind is freaking out, saying things like “how is that going to work, and what about this and that?” My heart knows that whatever action it is asking me to take is required for what I am meant to go through NOW. After the experience unfolds, things will be different, and it will ask me to take a new action, perhaps a new direction. If I see things as permanent, I will never takes risks, for fear that things will ALWAYS be that way.
This morning, as I enjoy my last moments of this incredible journey in Ubud, Bali at Clear Cafe on Hanuman Street, I am reminded that we NEVER know what comes next. Four years ago I was living in Los Angeles, CA and would have never thought I would move to Australia, and achieve so many of my dreams such as creating my dream job, living in another country, spending a month in India at the Oneness University, and then immersing in Yoga in Bali.
All I knew is my heart asked me to move to Australia.
It just asked me to take the leap.
As you can imagine, so many fears and doubts haunted me as they do anytime we take risks, follow our heart, and step into the unknown.
However, the more we do this, the more we see it as just part of the process, and when it happens the next time we take a leap, we recognise it, and we can trust a little more.
It all comes down to our perception right? Can we ever really make a mistake if everything we do is getting us more clear about who we really are, what we really believe, and what we really desire in our hearts? How can we go wrong if what we end up with is more faith, an expanded view of life, and a deeper connection to ourselves, the Divine, and others?
As I take off from Bali later today I will be embarking on this next phase of my life. I could sit here and tell you what that is going to look like, but the truth is…I have no idea. I have learned to let go of what we think we know and instead surrender to whatever is showing up in each and every moment, taking guided action that we can only take when we are present.
I would like to dedicate this article to the place in all of us that KNOWS even when it feels like we don’t know. Here’s to the ultimate SURRENDER. Here’s to letting go of what we think we know and what we think it’s all suppose to look like, in HONOUR of allowing, and therefore inviting in something that may be totally different than we’ve “planned,” and more than likely EVEN BETTER.
I’ll speak to you when I get to the other side!
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